- I had a rough week. I think getting pink eye on Monday was what settled it, but on top of that, I was just constantly tired and drained of energy. It didn't help that I'm due to get my period any moment now; my stomach has already started cramping up a bit. It was pretty difficult getting through classes. It seems like I have lost all form of movitation for school these days, not to mention the fact that I just felt so alone most nights when I was in Leiden. Thankfully I'm off now for a week. Webster is having a second project week but since they aren't making it mandatory I will take this time out to relax and hopefully finish off all final papers that need to be handed in in two weeks time. Then when I get back to school, there's two weeks until Christmas break. I can I do it, right?
- My eye is doing a lot better! Apparently its still a little red, but I can't really tell the difference anymore. The eye drops have worked like a charm; already the day after I was diagnosed, it started clearing up. My dad did come up to meet me on Tuesday morning though to bring me my glasses and I am very grateful that he did. Otherwise I would have had major problems following my classes. I even got a hazelnut hot chocolate out of it from Starbucks which was much appreciated. Though I am no longer contagious and can see perfectly again, I will continue to wear my glasses until the weekend is over. I've kinda grown to love them which is something I never thought possible.
- So I skipped out on going to the bar due to me being on medication (this didn't stop me from drinking, but I didn't do it excessively or anything like that). Instead I went over to Mats and Erik's place for taco night! It was a good time. The company was awesome and the food delicious. We didn't really do much aside from watch TV but it was good hanging out with my two favorite boys in Leiden. I hope we can have more dinner nights like that in the future.
- It seems that Koen and I have hit a snag that I did not see coming. Most of the nights we skyped this week escalated into arguments, but nothing could see what happened yesterday. I got upset at him because he told me he couldn't see me after school since he'd be working on projects all night long, but then he went and had dinner with a bunch of classmates. It wasn't that I was upset over him going out and enjoying himself, I was upset because he's constnatly stressing out over how much work he has to do and he's always behind. He took it the wrong way and dropped the bomb on me that he's been having doubts about our relationship. It threw me for such a loop that I couldn't stop crying every five minutes and due to that matter ended up not going to class. When I got home, I called him and he basically said he didn't know if he wanted to be with me anymore and I swear I don't know how I remained so calm but I did. I got him to explain himself to me and I said that I didn't think he really meant what he was saying because of how stressed out he's been. I mean, with work and school, the easiest thing to get out of is a relationship right? That doesn't mean he doesn't want to actually break up with me. Not to mention the fact that we've had a lot of issues in the span of our relationship and he could have walked out at any time, but he chose not to. Why wait seven months (our anniversary is tomorrow) to give up after we've both put so much effort into this? I managed to calm him down and work things out. He is willing to keep trying; after all, he admitted to the fact that since we got back together last month things have been a lot better between us. Today I could already tell that he was trying to move past it. I'm not entirely worried because this seems to happen when he's under a lot of pressure so I'm hoping by the time Christmas comes around, he'll feel a lot better about everything. I just hope he doesn't go off and do something crazy again. I can't bare to lose him.
- Today I just took it easy. I didn't sleep well last night due to everything that's been going on so I wanted to relax. Watched some TV shows, took an hour and half nap, finished reading The Chaos of Stars by Kiersten White and got addicted to Jelly Splash on my phone. Koen will be picking me up after his shift tonight. Wish me luck, I have no idea what to expect. Here's to hoping it goes well.
Current Mood: weird
Current Music: Neon Lights by Demi Lovato